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Soothing and regulating the little one.

One of the things I have noticed when my little one is activated is a split that goes one of two ways...hypo or hyper over stimulation.

So either shut down, frozen, no energy or moving very fast and feeling hectic inside, spinning. My whole world experience is that of an unregulated child's nervous system, my whole experience is being driven by her need for safety and it can be daunting to navigate.

My Mum and older sister called me Lucy when I was small. I very much relate to my child self as that name. I call her by that name whenever I am interacting with her. It is a deeply respectful honoring of her. It brought me closer to her and made it easier for me to identify the times she is in acute distress. She has taught me to ask her what she needs and how to listen to her.

One day she said, she wanted to draw butterflies. So that's what we did. I sat down with pastels and paper and let her tell me how to draw the butterflies. Ever since then when things get too much I draw butterflies for Lucy. It brings immediate calm and usually, eventually it brings joy.

The thing I have noticed about the drawing of these butterflies is how rhythmic and flowing the process is. They embody flow. In drawing them I am inadvertently rocking and soothing Lucy back to safety and peace. That's why she likes them so much.

This is a truly somatic experience that puts me in touch with the resource of self soothing and teaching my body self regulation. I am parenting her and nurturing myself in a profound and beautiful way....Ultimately I am resetting myself and my perception of the world.

I wonder how can you tend your little one? What do they like to do? Can you really let them know that you want to help them feel better, that you are right there? Are you willing to listen?

When life gets wobbly and super challenging I actually can't think of a more valuable investment in your self healing practice than to truly devote some time to the tiny wise spirit child inside.... A calm and regulated inner child is a far more centered and balanced sense of self and as an extension of that so is life.

Enormous hugs to all the little ones. Hope they love Lucy's butterflies as much as she does.


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